TELEPATHIC COMMUNICATION
by Muffin M'Randa Jones

My iPod was playing such good music.
All its songs were good.
I'd finally mastered telepathic communication with the shuffle setting.
But then, it started playing crappy music. "Bad iPod," I said.
"No," it said. "Bad human."
I guess telepathic communication with technology isn't a good idea.

Love STORY
God damn fucking emotional connections.
          But then again, Hey,
          I can afford to be cute first.
          MEOW
And now the whole fucking family loves me!
          I want to write poetry
          in the shower.
          I want you in my shower
          while I write poetry.
And oh, about that telepathic communication… Wait, wait… got the thought?
Okay, moving on.

I will make this break rules
And I will start every single fucking sentence with and!
And end them with and!
And if I feel so inclined, I won't do anything.

Clearly these rules are only stereotypes.
          Your songs are my quiet
          Your hair is my garden
          And your mouth?
          That's for kissing, stupid!
          No metaphor there.